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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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After that, I decide to hit up the market. You know, the one near the park? It’s always buzzing with life. Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that good stuff. I’m browsing, and I see this old lady selling the biggest tomatoes I’ve ever seen. I’m talking like, “Are these tomatoes or basketballs?” I had to buy one. Just had to.

Fig. 3. Wigmorean probabilistic inference network for hypothesis...